


The Fall

by criminal_intent



Category: Halt and Catch Fire
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-02-13
Packaged: 2018-09-23 21:12:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9677690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/criminal_intent/pseuds/criminal_intent
Summary: Joe falls through the floorboards at the old Mutiny building, except Tom wasn't there and it wasn't caused by anything in particular. How does Cameron handle this without Tom's presence? Will it change the course of history for Joe, Cameron, Donna, and Gordon?





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [weavingmemories](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weavingmemories/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I don't anything in here except my own words. There are certain phrases that were pulled directly from season 3, episode 10 "NeXT" and those belong exclusively to AMC and the writing team for Halt and Catch Fire.

“Oh, you’re here!” A deep voice greeted Cameron as she walked into the former Mutiny building, wooden doors swinging shut behind her.

Her eyes were immediately glued to Joe’s blue-clad form, which was teeming with excitement like she had never seen before. Behind him, a whiteboard was almost entirely full of writing, no doubt his. Despite their years apart, she was still positive she could pinpoint that messy scrawl anywhere. Before she could ask him anything about the crazy ramblings written behind him, a door to her right opened, revealing Donna and Gordon.

“Hey!” Donna said, giving the large room a quick glance before adding, “Where’s Tom?” Puzzlement graced her features, as though she had clearly expected Tom to follow Cameron everywhere.

“He, uh, decided to go to Texas early. We talked it out last night, and he just felt that yesterday wasn’t exactly fun for him and it wasn’t really his place to be here, so he’s leaving after his meeting this morning,” Cameron lied easily to the group, though she wasn’t entirely sure they bought it, particularly Donna and Joe.

That was _not_ how the night before had gone down. As soon as she came back to the motel after reuniting with Bos, she had found Tom using her laptop, a revelation that honestly startled and infuriated her, though she kept these feelings to herself. All he claimed was that the battery on his own laptop had died, but not much else was said between them before he announced that he was going to take a shower. Once he was out of sight, Cameron lifted up the lid of his computer to see that his story actually held true, but she couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling that he had been on her computer to find something on her.

She’d thought that her suspicions were all nonsense until Tom came out of the shower and she told him that he didn’t have to come back with her the next day. Tom had seemed legitimately angry that she intended to return and it confused her; he was never necessarily unsupportive of her, but this had been the first time that he’d been openly expressed his disapproval of one of her choices in their four years of marriage. She calmly tried to explain her reasons for wanting to go, but one thing led to another, and they were soon in a shouting match—that she was sure their neighbors could hear every word of—over what had happened that day. At one point, he’d asked her about COMDEX and what had happened there, which had completely taken her aback because he had never hinted at suspecting anything before, not even in those hesitant moments that she had stepped into their apartment when she got back to Tokyo. At some point in their relationship, lying to each other—even though most of the lies were small white lies—had become rather commonplace, and so in following that pattern, she’d told him that nothing had happened. While Tom normally would have accepted her word without question whether he believed her or not, this time it was apparently different.

“I need some air,” he’d huffed before quickly turning around, yanking the motel’s door open and slamming it shut behind him. She’d let out a long sigh, trying to calm her racing heart and bring herself to rationally reason with him.

Tom hadn’t been gone too long before he stepped back inside and told her that it was best if he went to Texas a few days ahead of schedule. He told her she could just meet him there when they’d originally planned. Her energy rapidly draining, she didn’t do anything except nod and agree with him that maybe some space would be good. The next morning, he’d dropped her off at the Mutiny office, but not before he’d explained his true reason for using her computer: to see if she’d been in contact with Joe. She’d suspected that this was the reason, and yet, that shock of betrayal still hit her hard, despite her having no reason to truly feel that way considering what had actually transpired the month before in Vegas. She’d coldly kissed him goodbye and told him she loved him—though she had to convince herself to say it and mean it—before she got out of the car and roughly shut the door behind her, only sparing a long glance at the car as he drove out of the parking lot.

That was how she had ended up by herself inside the Mutiny building, ready to take on whatever these three had in store for them.

“Oh, okay. But we’re all here now, so let’s get started!” Joe exclaimed, taking her explanation in stride before turning around launching on a tirade about what the World Wide Web was going to be—or not.

With all but Joe gathered around the table, he resumed his position at the whiteboard and went on and on about how it didn’t matter what would happen with the internet, it just mattered that it _did_ happen. He threw endless facts at them here and there, facts they knew and had heard. Perplexed, they let Joe continue on his little rant, till Donna interrupted with, “Okay, so what’s your point?”

Not the slightest bit discouraged, he said, “It's a waste of time to try to figure out what the Web will become. We just don't know. Because right now, at the end of the day, it's just an online research catalogue running on NeXT computers on a small network in Europe.”

Annoyed at this rather vague attempt at answering Donna, Cameron chimed in, “So, you're saying everything we've talked about since we got here has been a waste of time?”

Joe shook his head before he began pacing around them. “I'm saying, let's take a step back. Literally, a step back. How did we all get here today? The choices we made, the sheer force of our will, something like that? Here's another answer: the winds of fate. Random coincidence, some unseen hand just pushing us along. Destiny. How did we all get here today? We walked through this door. We don't have to build a big white box or a stadium, or invent rock and roll. The moment we decide what the Web is, we've lost. The moment we try to tell people what to do with it, we've lost. All we have to do is build a door and let them inside.”

Evidently noticing that the three of them still weren’t phased by his answer, he took a new approach. “When I was five, my mother took me to the city.”

Cameron immediately perked up at this. Despite her ability to get stories out of him regarding his past when they had been together, she still felt like she knew so little. So, anytime he brought up his past, she was instantly glued to his words. She already knew that this time would be no different. 

“We went through the Holland Tunnel, and it was basic. Concrete and steel. But it was also my excitement sitting in the backseat, wondering when it was going to be our turn to emerge. It was the explosion of sunlight. And when we exited the tunnel, all of Manhattan was laid out before us. And that was the best part of the trip, the amazing possibility to be able to go anywhere within something that is magnificent and never-ending. This is the first Web browser, the rudimentary one CERN built to view and edit research. I wrote it up here for you to see how simple it is. It takes up one whiteboard that's basic concrete and steel. But we can take this and we can build a door, and we can be the first ones to do it. Because right now, everyone else sees this as—”

Donna chimed in. “As an online research catalogue.” 

Gordon came next. “Running on NeXT.”

And finally, Cameron finished Joe’s previously meaningless phrasing. “On a network in Europe.”

Joe’s eyes lit up as he saw everyone hesitantly smiling. “And with this handful of code, we can build the Holland Tunnel.”

Awe was carved into everyone’s faces. Cameron let out a laugh, suddenly seeing Joe in a light that she had never seen before. Joe caught her eye and she felt a wave of warmth rush through her.

She saw it. She finally saw something that could change the world, something that all four of them in this room could do. Cameron wasn’t even sure if Mutiny had ever brought this level of amazement to her.

Just as he was about to explain more in-depth, a loud creaking echoed around the room. Everyone’s smiles suddenly disappeared as they looked around for the source of the sound. Joe caught Cameron’s eye once again and gave her a slightly perplexed look, which she mirrored. He shrugged and turned back to look at the whiteboard again before all of a sudden a deafening _crack_ of wood reverberated across the room and the floor gave out beneath Joe’s feet. 

Cameron let out a scream of horror, leaping up from the bench she had been sitting on which toppled behind her with a loud thud. She was sure her stomach had just fallen through the floor with Joe. Her body immediately started violently trembling. In all of her 29 years of being alive, she could honestly say that she had never felt this terrified. 

“Joe?!” she shouted, racing around the tables and over to the large, splintered hole.

Looking down below, Cameron saw Joe lying on top of the old mainframe, covered in dust, his wrist bent at a weird angle. She couldn’t see the bottom half of his body, but she was sure it wasn’t any better.

Her body acted of its own accord and before she knew it, she was rushing to the stairs at the far end of the enormous room. She heard footsteps thudding behind her but didn’t bother to look to see who it was.

Cameron faintly heard Donna saying, “Joe, Cameron and Gordon are on there way down there. Just hang on, okay?” Whatever she said after was drowned out when Cameron bolted down the stairwell to the basement. In her haste, her shoulder collided roughly with the brick wall lining the staircase, but she barely registered it.

“Joe?!” she yelled again, running toward the mainframe, feet pounding against the concrete floor. He didn’t respond and her heart thudded even faster in her chest.

There was debris scattered everywhere; fragments of wood, insulation, and drywall littered the floor. She dodged the mess as best as she could, hopping over this and that before coming up to Joe. Despite her height, she couldn’t reach him or see the damage done to him and she felt panic start to well up inside of her. 

Gordon was right behind her, but she barely noticed him as she began searching for something to raise her up to Joe’s level. Gordon seemed to be thinking along the same lines as her because he shouted, “We need to find something to help us get him down!” He spun around before moving in the opposite direction of her.

Something caught Cameron’s eye. Crammed under the staircase, she saw one of the old desks that had been down here when the building was full of coders; a relic that apparently had never been sold off with the rest of the furniture.

Joe gave out a low groan and it sprung her into action immediately. “Gordon! Help me move this table!” she exclaimed, using all of her strength to try and drag the heavy desk over to the mainframe. Gordon sprinted over and helped lift the table far enough off the ground to move it across the debris.

Once again, Cameron distantly heard Donna comforting Joe, but it was all white noise to her; she could barely hear anything over the nonstop pounding of her heart.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Joe attempt to sit up, but he let out a hiss of pain and fell back against the top of the machines.

“Joe, don’t move, okay? We’ll be right there,” she said in what she hoped was a soothing voice instead of the panicked crack she was was sure came out of her mouth.

Gordon and Cameron dropped the desk close to mainframe and pushed it until a metallic _thud_ echoed across the room. At that, Cameron immediately climbed on top of the table and reached for Joe, finally able to get a proper look at him.

“Oh, my god. Are you okay?” she asked, not even caring about the worry that was obviously clouding her voice. 

Joe didn’t say anything, just blearily looked at her before giving a curt nod. Cameron glanced over his body and saw that his right wrist was even more damaged than she had thought; it was clearly broken, hanging awkwardly off the side of the mainframe. With his clothes still in one piece, it was hard to tell what other damage had been done. Tears prickling her eyes, she blinked in an attempt to ignore them as she moved down towards his feet and began gently taking off the chunks of wood that had managed to follow him with his fall. When Cameron pulled a particularly heavy piece off his right ankle, Joe gave out a sharp yelp.

“What is it?” Gordon said, concern lacing every word.

“I think he might have broken his ankle,” Cameron replied, as she quickly moved back up towards the upper half of his body. He was watching her beneath heavy lids, his eyes conveying terror and pain that only caused her panic to increase.

She gently brushed her fingers through his dust-covered hair, softly saying, “We need to get you down. Can you move at all?”

Without responding, he once again tried to sit up. This time, Cameron didn’t try to stop him, but her hands acted of their own accord, slowly pushing at his back and supporting his shoulders as he used what was left of his strength to haul himself into a sitting position.

“Donna, call 9-1-1!” Gordon shouted. For some reason that triggered Joe to finally speak.

“No, I’m okay,” he rasped, letting out a pained cough. “One of you can drive me to the hospital.” 

“Are you insane? Joe, you at least have a few broken limbs and what is going to be some severe bruising, and god knows what else! We’re calling 9-1-1.” Gordon said, desperately trying to reason with Joe.

“No, the police aren’t going to let us work down here tomorrow if they come here. I’m fine. Just…just help me get down.”

Gordon looked helplessly at Cameron, expecting her to agree with him that Joe needed to be carted away in an ambulance. She _did_ agree, but she also saw Joe’s point, and selfishly, she liked Joe’s side more. He was sitting now and he was conscious, so that was at least a small blessing and the beginnings of a good sign.

Letting out a deep sigh, she glanced at Joe, then at Gordon, and said, “Let’s just get him upstairs and get him to the hospital. It’s not that far from here.”

  

* * *

 

Cameron and Donna rushed Joe into the emergency room as quickly as they could manage with his injured leg while Gordon parked the car in the hospital’s garage. Joe was leaning heavily against them, Cameron carrying the brunt of his weight on his mostly uninjured left side.

The ride to the hospital had been fraught with anxious energy. Cameron sat in the backseat with Joe, gently supporting his legs. Gordon drove quickly but carefully as possible, trying not to jostle Joe and cause even more damage. Donna kept looking back at the two of them, her face etched with worry. Joe wasn’t saying a word, not even emitting a groan; he just silently gritted his teeth and kept his focus on Cameron. Every couple minutes, she would reach over and run a soothing hand over the side of his face, which seemed to lessen the pain to a degree.

He was still gritting his teeth and was starting to break into a sweat when they got him up to the receptionist’s counter.

“Hi, how can I help you?” said a frazzled and clearly exhausted woman. The waiting room didn’t seem that busy, but one could only imagine how long this woman had been working. 

“He fell through broken floorboards down into the basement of our office building,” Donna said, clearly much more calm than Cameron, who was sure she would have nearly shouted that sentence. 

She signaled a group of nurses and they cautiously ushered Joe onto a wheelchair, unsure of the extent of his injuries, and proceeded to wheel him down a hallway without saying hardly a word.

“I’m coming with him!” Cameron exclaimed a little more loudly than she had intended to. She felt her anxiety reaching a tipping point and she suddenly had the urge to be with him the entire time.

One of the nurses eyed her warily before asking, “Are you family?” 

Without even thinking, Cameron blurted out, “Yeah, I’m his fiancée.” She was sure Gordon’s and Donna’s eyebrows were in their hairlines at that comment, but she couldn’t even pretend to care right now. She purposefully didn’t look at Joe’s reaction.

“Okay, go on. I’ll need the two of you to stay out here in the waiting room, though.”

Cameron gave Donna and Gordon a nervous smile before turning around and following Joe and the group of nurses to the examination room.

  

* * *

 

“God, I hope he’s okay. I shouldn’t have had the meeting there. I knew that place wasn’t stable after the last earthquake,” Donna said, wringing her hands together. She was impatiently sitting next to Gordon in the waiting room. They had been there for over an hour with hardly any news other than the occasional, “We’re still running tests,” from a nurse.

“Hey. You didn’t know this would happen. Don’t blame yourself, okay?” Gordon responded, turning slightly in his seat to get a better look at her. Donna just gave a quick nod, but he’d been married to her for over 12 years, so he knew what that nod meant, being divorced didn’t change that. He also knew that words of comfort usually weren’t enough to get her to stop blaming herself for something, so he quietly left her to her own thoughts. 

After a few moments of silence, he decided to at least change the subject to try to take Donna’s mind off the incident. “So, his fiancée, huh?”

Donna immediately perked up and turned to look at him. “Okay, so you thought that was weird, too?” 

“Well, hasn’t she been married to a different guy for four years? You wouldn’t think that comment would have rolled off the tongue so easily. If this situation wasn’t so serious, I would never let her live this one down, despite the possibility that she might murder me,” Gordon said, chuckling at the thought of Cameron’s eyes burning with rage over his taunting.

Donna paused before saying, “I’m just glad Tom wasn’t here. I’m sure he wouldn’t have let Cameron come with Joe to the hospital. I mean, you saw how he acted yesterday.” Donna hesitantly added, “I think Joe needs her.”

“Yeah,” Gordon said thoughtfully. He’d honestly known that since 1983. He hadn’t seen it at first, not even entirely after they’d broke up either, but once he’d met Sara, it became glaringly obvious that Cameron was the one he needed in his life. Gordon had been far from impressed with Sara, and apparently all of his negative perceptions of her proved true because she was gone from Joe’s life in the blink of an eye. And then after Ryan…it had all been too obvious that Cameron was the only one who could have pulled him out of that hole he had buried himself in. He’d seen it as soon as Cameron had walked into the old Mutiny building yesterday.

A few minutes later, a doctor sauntered out of a room at the end of the hall towards the nurse’s station, Joe and Cameron following a few steps behind him. Joe had a solid white cast on his right arm and was hobbling out of the room, still avoiding weight on his right leg, but there were no crutches which was a good sign.

“So, what’s the verdict?” Gordon asked, standing up and walking towards them.

Joe held up his cast, but before he could explain, Cameron stated matter-of-factly, “Broken wrist, sprained ankle, busted knee, and a whole lot of bruising.”

Donna’s hand came to rest over her neck at Cameron’s words, the worry that had been steadily disappearing coming back in full-force. “Oh, Joe, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Donna. I’ll be fine, I just need rest,” Joe replied, not looking angry with her in the slightest. Cameron, on the other hand almost looked suspicious, as if she blamed Donna for the flimsy floorboards. Donna swallowed thickly at this.

“I’d say you probably need some painkillers, too,” Gordon added with a chuckle. Joe smirked at this and despite Donna’s concern over Cameron’s reaction, found herself somewhat touched by this. Gordon and Joe had become close again four years ago, loathe as Donna was to accept it, and the fact that they had drifted apart didn’t seem to change their repertoire, which she was glad of. At least one thing had stayed constant. 

“Can we head back to the Mutiny building? I need to grab my things before I head home,” Joe said to Gordon.

“Yeah, let me pull the car around to the front and I’ll meet you you guys out there,” he replied as he dug his keys out of his pockets, turned around, and quickly walked toward the parking garage. 

Cameron and Donna shared an awkward and strained look before Cameron muttered, “Come on,” to Joe and helped him work his way out of the hospital.

Donna let out a deep and shaky sigh before following behind them. The World Wide Web did not seem like it was going to do as much to repair her relationship with Cameron as she had thought.

 

* * *

 

“I’m going to give Tom a call. He’s probably worried,” Cameron announced a couple minutes after they arrived back at Mutiny. She avoided Joe’s eye as she turned to her old office, leaving the door open just a crack. Donna had gone downstairs to assess the damage in the basement, leaving Joe and Gordon to their own devices.

“You're lucky you're not dead,” Gordon finally said. Joe looked over at him. 

“Yeah, I know, but it was no one’s fault,” he paused before adding, “If we’re placing blame, we can always just say it was Tom’s fault.”

Gordon let out a hesitant laugh at that before it turned into a full-bodied laugh, which Joe soon copied. At least they could still look on the bright side of things every once in a while. Joe also couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction that Gordon apparently disliked Tom, too.

Gordon let out a sigh and changed the subject. “God, Cameron was right yesterday, wasn’t she? There’s no such thing as the future. All there is is now.”

Slightly taken aback by the abrupt change of subject to the Web, Joe nodded at him, imploring Gordon to continue. 

“Maybe if we do it now, we could be the first. Regardless, I am done waiting,” Gordon said, sitting up straight and staring at Joe with passion written all over his face.

Joe had been sitting in his apartment for the last four years, doing nothing with his life. There was no meaning to his existence anymore, he was just…there. Seeing Cameron again at COMDEX had changed everything. She had breathed life back into him. He finally saw a light at the end of the tunnel, and right now, it was blinding him.

Staring back at Gordon with the same level of intensity, he said, “I can’t let this one get away.”

“Then don’t.”

 

* * *

 

Cameron hung up the phone in her old office feeling so many emotions that she couldn’t even name them all if she tried. Her conversation with Tom had been stilted at best, and she ended the conversation as quickly as possible, not even returning his ‘I love you.’

Walking over to one of the windows, she stared down at the dark parking lot, illuminated only by a single lamppost, the rest of them long burnt out.

“Do you think he’ll be okay?”

Cameron turned around and looked at Donna as she hesitantly entered the room.

“Yeah, he’ll be fine. It’s just a broken wrist and some bruises. He just needs some rest.”

Donna gave Cameron a look that was almost akin to pity. “I’m glad he’s okay.”

Sucking in a deep breath, she closed her eyes, sat back against the window ledge. She knew Donna didn’t care for Joe, and probably never would, but she knew also knew the main reasoning behind Donna’s dislike for him and she suddenly felt the need to defend him, an urge that had never really taken over her before. “It’s so easy to make Joe the bad guy. I mean, making him the villain takes the blame away.”

Donna’s look of pity suddenly turned into sorrow, and she opened her mouth to reply, but before she could do so, Cameron continued, “But in everything that's happened with him, every single time…I deserve some of the blame, too. And it's the same with you.”

Tears were starting to well up in Donna’s eyes, and once again, she tried to say something, but Cameron interjected. “Things fell apart. And you did what you did, but…a lot of it was my fault, she explained, nodding her head to emphasize her point. 

Donna tilted her head and searched Cameron’s face. For a moment, Cameron almost felt like forgiving her for everything that had happened four years ago in this very building, but she quickly came back to her senses and only said, “This is a really cool idea.”

Donna took a few more steps towards Cameron. “Yeah, I think so, too! And, look, if—”

Her sentence was cut off by a knock on the doorframe from Gordon. “Hey guys, sorry to cut in, but I think Joe’s ready to head home. He looked like he was going to pass out on me while we were talking.”

Cameron sat up straight at that, not sure if she was mad or pleased at Gordon’s interruption.

“Oh, okay,” Cameron said, standing back up and turning to Donna. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay? I think we really have something here.”

“Yeah, I do, too. I’m going to sift through some of those boards downstairs and try to make some space for us tomorrow. See you in the morning, Cameron.” For a second, Cameron was almost afraid Donna was going to give her a hug, but instead, she gave Cameron a genuine smile, one that Cameron could only return with a tight one of her own.

Cameron walked out of the room and headed towards Joe in the center of the old warehouse.

“Hey, Gordon said you were ready to get out of here?”

“Oh, so that’s where you went off to, huh?” Joe said with a small chuckle.

“Well, you were nodding off on me and I needed a new person to talk to,” Gordon joked back at him. 

Cameron grabbed both her and Joe’s bags and threw the straps over her shoulder. She located her suitcase over by one of the pillars and went to retrieve it as Gordon helped Joe out of the chair. 

“You heading out with us, too?” Cameron asked Gordon. 

“Nah, you guys go ahead. I’m going to help Donna clean up the basement.”

“Well, all right then. See you tomorrow,” Joe said.

“Yeah, you take care, Joe. See ya, Cameron.” She gave a smile in response, though it wasn’t the same strained smile that she had just given Donna.

 

* * *

 

They sat in the cab in silence. The only sound was the faint hum coming from the cabbie’s radio. The streetlights lit up the car every other second, illuminating their tired faces and the vivid white of Joe’s cast.

Finally, the driver pulled to a stop in front of a block of apartments. This was far from the glamorous penthouse that Joe had occupied four years before. They weren’t run down by any means, but they didn’t scream ‘luxury’ like some of his past residences had. She didn’t know why but this brought a tinge of sadness to her; it was such a step away from the Joe she’d first met.

Joe gave a soft groan when he moved his body to awkwardly open the right passenger door with his uninjured left arm. Cameron immediately grabbed her shoulder bag and threw open her own door before slamming it shut and rushing over to his side to help him.

“I got it,” he said in a slightly strained voice, bracing his left arm on the frame of the car to try and pull himself up. When he put too much weight on his right leg, he stumbled, almost completely pitching forward onto the concrete sidewalk. Cameron’s arms shot out grabbing onto his shoulder and chest. His once obvious pride didn’t come into play, and he didn’t bother trying to push her away, just allowed her to support him. 

“You okay, man?” the driver asked as he got out of the car, moving to the popped trunk to get her suitcase. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks,” he said quietly, not looking the driver in the eyes. Cameron could see embarrassment tinting his face. Once he was steady again, she reached inside the cab to grab his bag and shut the door before shouldering the bag on top of her own. 

Moving past Joe towards the cabbie, she reached blindly into her brown leather bag until she found her wallet. Unzipping the wallet, she quickly pulled out a brand new American one-hundred-dollar bill that she had gotten from the airport a couple days ago and pushed it into the driver’s hand with a quiet, “Thanks.” He slammed the trunk closed and walked back to the front of the car. Cameron pulled up the handle of the suitcase and rolled it up to where Joe was standing on the sidewalk.

“I thought you were going back to your hotel?” Joe asked as soon as Cameron stopped next to him, shoving her wallet back in her bag as the cab drove off behind them. She had never told the driver that she needed to be dropped off at a separate location, and she figured Joe had picked up on the meaning behind that, but she had clearly been wrong. He was probably too exhausted and in pain to notice that, something that was slightly worrying to her.

Ignoring his question, she readjusted both of their bags and pulled on her suitcase. “Is this it then?” she asked, gesturing to the door a few yards in front of them.

“Uh, yeah,” he answered, seemingly confused at her ignorance to what he’d asked. He limped slowly towards the door, Cameron following closely behind him in case he almost pitched forward again.

They reached the door, where a nondescript mat greeted them as he attempted to fish in his right pocket with his injured arm for his keys.

“Joe,” she warned, moving to help him.

“I got it. I’m fine,” he repeated, pulling out the keys, the key ring dangling off the tip of his middle finger. He transferred them to his left hand and clumsily shoved the correct key in the slot and turned it.

Pushing open the door, his hand crept around to the side, flicked on a switch, and light washed across the room, giving her a glimpse into the life Joe had been living for the past four years.

It gutted her.

There wasn’t a single item in the place that would hint at Joe MacMillan living here. It was full of plain, dark furniture; the only source of art in the apartment were the very few paintings lining the walls, all matching the color of the furniture. It was like the place was completely devoid of a soul. She felt a prickle at the back of her eyes at the image.

Nevertheless, she followed his footsteps into the lifeless space. She let the bags slide off her shoulder and onto the floor haphazardly. This sort of carless behavior had driven him nuts when they had been together, her belongings all scattered across his apartment with no rhyme or reason. He had dealt with it by just kicking them under his bed and pretending they didn’t exist. But now, he didn’t even bat an eye at it. Cameron swallowed thickly before she bent down and looked in her bag once more.

“Hey, let’s get you some of those pain meds they prescribed you. I’m sure you aren’t feeling great right now.” She stood up and opened the paper bag containing a few pill bottles that the hospital had given him. 

“Right. Yeah, okay,” he said nonchalantly. She bit on her lower lip at his emotionless response and moved around him in search of the kitchen. She immediately came across it on the left of the short hallway, just past his living room.

Setting the pills down on the counter, she opened a couple cupboards until she found his stash of drinking glasses. She pulled one down and sidled over to the sink to fill the cup with water. Grabbing the pills, she spun on her heel and was surprised to see that Joe had followed her to the doorway of the kitchen.

“Oh,” she breathed. “Here.” She pushed the glass of water into his hand. 

Fishing into the bag, she read each container until she found the painkillers, which she pulled out and popped the cap off of before handing a single pill over to Joe. Holding her gaze, he took the white capsule from her hand, placed it on his tongue, and swallowed it with a large gulp of water.

“What about the others?” he said, pointing to the bag as he cleared his throat.

It took a second for her to come out of the slight daze she had just been in. “Huh? Oh, um, one is just a high-dosage of Ibuprofen, so you can take that during the day, and the other looks like it will knock you out, so you need to take that before bed.”

Joe gave her a puzzled stare at the last part of her response, clearly at loss as to why she wasn’t giving that pill to him now.

“I think we need to talk,” was all she said. Cameron shifted past him and walked into the living room. She tossed the bag of pills onto the coffee table in front of her and sank down onto the black leather couch.

Joe followed shortly after, though he sat down stiffly on the edge of the couch cushion next to her, as if he was afraid of what she was going to say or do. She didn’t even know where to begin, but she didn’t need to come up with a topic because Joe almost immediately led into one.

“Why did Tom really leave this morning?”

Cameron was mildly shocked at the blunt question, but took it in stride, though she didn’t directly answer his question. “Did you say something to him about COMDEX?”

“I only mentioned that I had seen you there, I didn’t say another word. I promise,” he added that last part after a slight pause. She narrowed her eyes at that response though.

“Well, last night we got into a fight and he asked me what had happened in Vegas. I assumed you had said something that caught him off guard because he had never once assumed anything had happened out there, not even when I came home. Seriously, Joe, what did you say to him?”

“I’m not lying to you, Cameron. I thought we were past that at this point…” He paused before adding, “It’s not my fault that he took what I said the wrong way.”

Cameron threw up her hands before saying, “Oh, my god, Joe! This isn’t a joke.”

“I never said it was.”

She was taken aback by the intensity of his tone in those five words. She wasn’t sure what to make of this.

Swallowing thickly, Cameron said, “He got into my computer and looked for evidence of us.” She didn’t know why she was saying this to him, as it really wasn’t any of his business. 

Joe only nodded at this as if he expected nothing less from the man she had chosen to marry.

She didn’t know what to say after that. She almost didn’t even know why she had mentioned that they’d needed to talk. Did they really need to? Or was she just looking for an excuse to keep him by her side?

“Why didn’t you say goodbye?” Joe asked her quietly, steering the conversation away from Tom. 

“What?”

“At COMDEX. Why didn’t you wake me up that morning?”

Cameron blinked in surprise at the vulnerability in his voice.

“I—I don’t know,” she replied, looking down at her hands as she started wringing them together, avoiding his gaze. She knew damn well why she hadn’t woken him up. She thought it had been obvious.

His uninjured hand came to rest on top of hers, holding her restless digits still. “I think you do.” 

There wasn’t a chance in hell that she would have boarded that flight back to Tokyo if she had talked to him that morning. Leaving his beautiful sleeping form behind had been hard enough, but she wasn’t about to admit that.

“I was late for my flight. I didn’t have time for goodbyes,” she lied, except it wasn’t with the same ease in which she told lies to Tom. And Joe saw right through it.

“No. That’s not why.”

“Why does it matter, Joe? I don’t even live here anymore.” 

“It matters, and you know it.”

“God, Joe!” she exclaimed as she stood up and turned around to look down at him. “I’m married. We shouldn’t even have done that in the first place. I was drunk. I wasn’t in my right mind.”

“Really? Because you seemed to be along the same lines of sobriety as I was, and I can tell you that I knew exactly what I was doing.” He pulled himself off the couch with the help of the armrest. Despite her anger, part of her immediately wanted to push him back down and force him to stay still so he didn’t hurt himself more than he already had, but she held her tongue and firmly kept his gaze. 

“We’re not having this conversation.” She turned around and walked further into the room, away from him.

“Why? Because you don’t want to admit what this really is?” 

“It was a mistake, Joe! It shouldn’t have even happened!” That was a lie if there ever had been one, but she held to it. 

Hurt danced across his face, but was quickly replaced with anger once again. “A mistake, huh? You called that second time that night a mistake? The third? How about that fourth when it was almost light outside? Was that still a mistake to you?”

Tears were welling up in her eyes. She couldn’t admit what that truly had been. No way. It would be the end of her marriage if she said it.

So once again, she asked, “Why does this even matter?! I’m with Tom! I’ve been married to him for four years!”

“I’m not talking about Tom right now. I’m talking about you and me. I’m talking about our first night together since ’83. I’m talking about the fact that both of us were sober enough to put a stop to it if we had really wanted to. So tell me, Cameron, if it was such a mistake, why didn’t you stop me? Why didn’t you send me back to my own hotel room? Why accept me back into your life, back into your bed, if all of this was a mistake?” 

Her chin wobbled at what he had just spat at her. She blinked rapidly to control the tears that were threatening to spill down her cheeks. The only thing she could think to ask again, in all of her broken rage was, “Why does this matter?!” 

“Because I’m in love with you!” he shouted.

Her jaw dropped at his words and she let out a shaky gasp. She could barely believe what she had just heard. Joe staggered a little as if that confession had taken all the energy out of him. He leaned back against the arm of the couch and looked at her with all the vulnerability of a man who had been torn apart and only partially placed back together.

She had no words, and she knew there was no way she would be able to get him to repeat what he had just said, not now at least. Cameron had waited seven years to hear him say those three words. She was sure she had felt his love back in ’83, back in the basement of Westgroup, back in her hotel room in Vegas, but she had never, ever heard him say it, and she thought she never would. 

She couldn’t think of a single thing to say, she didn’t even think her own ‘I love you’ would suffice, and so she walked over to him in a couple short strides and fiercely pressed her lips against his. It was almost a spitting image of their reunion kiss a month ago in Las Vegas, but this time it meant more. It meant the emotions and unspoken words that had been lingering between them for seven years were finally coming to the surface.

His good hand came up to firmly grip the back of her head as he tilted his head slightly and deepened the kiss. Cameron moved her hands from his jaw to his cheeks, pulling him in even closer, and with that pressing the tip of her tongue against the seam of his lips, begging for entry. He granted it without hesitation and soon their tongues where moving in that rhythm that would forever be familiar to them, no matter how long they were apart from one another. It was a comfort that made her think of _home_ and she didn’t want it to ever stop.

He moved to his left and slowly brought both of them back down on the couch. She climbed over his lap, carefully making sure not to rest too much of her body weight on him. He didn’t seem to notice, though, because he only kissed her deeper and held her closer. She felt the heavy weight of his cast rest against her waist, while one of her own hands moved back to tangle in his hair, reveling in those soft locks that she always missed.

He dropped his head to her neck, lavishing attention in all the places that she loved. Attention that she hadn’t had in over a month. He still remembered ever sensitive spot on her skin, every place that drove her insane and caused her heart to race and her breath to come out in pants. It had overwhelmed her that night in COMDEX, knowing that he still held her entire body in his memory.

Cameron moved her head back to its original positon, gave him a lingering kiss on the lips before returning the favor to his own neck. She tasted the skin peaking out from under his white shirt, memorizing each tendon and vein and the feeling of his collarbone at the base of that strong neck. However, just as her hand came down to reacquaint herself with more of his body, she must have brushed one of his bruises because he stiffened and gave a gasp of pain.

“Oh, my god. Are you okay?” she asked, worry lining every inch of her face as she pulled back to look him up and down.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it. I’m fine,” he responded, bringing her mouth back to his, but she wasn’t having it.

“No, Joe. We’re not doing this tonight.”

“Cameron,” he whispered. It was a plea, there was no other way to describe it. “I can’t let this go. Not again.”

His words were like a punch in the gut, and yet she felt an odd sense of warmth flow through her body. It had been a long time since she had felt truly needed. She didn’t even know what to do with that fact.

Leaning forward, she brushed the softest of kisses against his lips. “I’m not going anywhere,” she whispered back. “You’re hurt, Joe. What you need is medicine and sleep.”

“No,” he said, his voice strangled. “I need you.”

“Again, I’m not going anywhere. We have time to do this another day when you’re better.” To lighten the mood, with a chuckle she added, “That way it won’t feel like I’m having sex with a ninety-year-old man.”

He chuckled lightly at his words, but it sounded more like a laugh of relief than anything. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.” 

Pressing one more soft kiss against his lips, she carefully stood up and held out her hand to pull him off the couch. He took it without hesitation and stood to his full height, leaning down and brushing another kiss against her lips.

Her hand still in his, she reached down to the coffee table and snatched the bag of pills with her other hand before following Joe out of the living room and down to the cozy confines of his bedroom and the much needed rest that awaited them.

  

* * *

 

Donna appeared across the large room a few moments after Cameron and Joe had entered the building. “Oh, hey guys! How are you doing, Joe?” she asked, and Cameron was genuinely surprised when it seemed like she was saying this with actual concern for his well-being and not just out of guilt.

“I’m doing a little better. A little achy, but it’s nothing I can’t handle,” he responded with a small smile.

“That’s good to hear. Well, Gordon and I are downstairs and we’re ready when you are,” she said returning Joe’s smile.

“Yeah, we’ll be right down,” Cameron replied somewhat shortly. Donna glanced at her with what could be nothing but respect, clearly thrilled that Cameron had actually showed up for another day of this. Cameron was still hesitant to buy into her act, so she just gave her the same tight smile as the night before.

Donna seemed slightly hurt by this but but quickly covered it with another smile and turned around and walked to the stairs at the far end of the building. Once she was out of sight, Cameron took Joe’s left hand in hers and turned to face him.

Last night had been the first time she had slept well in what felt like years. Joe had pulled her against his left side and she had fallen asleep to the rhythm of his heart and the soothing sound of his breathing. And this time, she had been there when he had woken up. There wasn’t a single part of her that regretted it either.

“Are you ready for this?” she asked him. She wasn’t just referring to the project waiting for them downstairs, and he clearly knew this because a smile lit up his face at the memories of last night and this morning.

“I’ve been ready for this for years.”

She smiled brightly and leaned forward to press a kiss against his lips, one which he gladly returned. She couldn’t help herself from stealing a second one before she broke apart, gently tugged on his hand and led him towards the basement.

Joe let her help him with the stairs once more, just as he had getting into the building several minutes ago. There was a level of trust with her in this that she was sure she would have never seen in the Joe she knew in 1983, and it truly touched her. 

Donna’s and Gordon’s heads turned as they noisily made their way down the last few steps together. Gordon was sitting at the computer close to the mainframe, Donna to his right. The debris from yesterday had been cleared significantly and Cameron briefly wondered how long they had been here last night before the sight of Gordon typing became too much of a distraction.

Once they had stopped behind Gordon’s chair with a clear view of the monitor, Gordon said to no one in particular, “You know how long I've been waiting, just sitting around the last four years, twiddling my thumbs? Maybe this future’s bet we made will finally pay off.” Cameron smirked at this because she knew that was the case for every single one of them.

Cameron glanced at Joe and gave him an encouraging smile before her eyes rolled over Donna’s and Gordon’s forms. It was time.

“All right. Let’s do this,” Joe said, leaning over Gordon’s shoulder. Cameron and Donna both mirrored his movements and the four of them watched as NSFNET opened the portal to CERN and all that the World Wide Web was going to bring them.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this! I'm sure all you Lee Pace fans out there caught onto the title of this fic ;) This fic kind of had a mind of its own. I thought it was going to be like 2,000 words max, but yeaaahhh...that didn't happen haha.
> 
> The request from weavingmemories was a fic involving Joe, Cameron, Donna, and Gordon that showed their dynamics and was filled with angst and drama. I hope I met all your requirements and that you enjoyed this! I loved writing it!
> 
> Let me know what you all thought! Comments and kudos are love <3
> 
> Come bother me on Tumblr at paceofbase :)


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